Introduction
With the advent and stride of Feminism in its fourth wave, society has, as always, found quite a lot of flaws with the movement. This time, it is surprisingly not within the whims and fashions of being just a woman and standing up for the gender. It is something else. Have you heard the unending podcasts made and marketed by male influencers/celebrities that cater to one point only- male loneliness? The rising number of such podcasters and the sheer amount of such creative content have pointed out Feminism to be the root of their problems. Which brings us to the reality and the complex question- Is it though?
Male loneliness is not something created by Feminism. While something as complicated as this social problem requires sensitivity and safe discussions, the reality is much worse. Pointing a finger at Feminism as the root cause oversimplifies this and distracts us from the complex structural, economic and cultural forces.
The Male Loneliness Epidemic
Loneliness is a frequently misunderstood term. Most people associate it with being single, and subsequently a person who has not achieved the goal of being humanely social. However, the truth is that, barring social awkwardness and romantic failure, loneliness is not the same as being alone. What men report these days is deeply rooted in the absence of meaningful relationships, emotional intimacy and a connection that few people cherish. And it's absolutely okay to want all that, by either gender. Branding it an epidemic, though, is a narrowing of consequences, mainly because there is no cause for it.
The results have been rather drastic, resulting from depression, substance abuse and even suicide among men. Loneliness is not just a term anymore; it has become an "illness" that men are falling in and why? All credits go to women.
The Manosphere and the Blame Game
With the turn of such events, a loose network of online communities, influencers and even media figures has built up, who frame male loneliness as an epidemic. Morever they consider it to be a direct result of feminist overreach and female empowerment. Thus started the YouTube channels, the documentaries and the podcasts. Men are having discussions with other men at length about how Feminism should be curbed to bring the loneliness epidemic to a close.
Podcasts, channels and personal handles indeed offer people the opportunity and space to voice their opinions. But these spaces have now become a table for portraying a whole movement guilty of another gender failing to find suitable suitors. These podcasts are a language for pain, but paired with a narrative of victimhood and blame. Feminism has supposedly rigged the dating market, stripping men of the chances of finding a true partner.
Blaming Feminism for Yet Another Failure
Studies and research have been done on this "male loneliness epidemic", and no scholar (feminist or non) denies the struggles that men face in society. They also point out the fact that the common perception of gender roles is very stringent in society. Rigid gender norms dictate that men be constrained emotionally and be less social while finding partners. This is a complex ruling steeped in dominance and stoicism. Patriarchy not only harms women, but it also sentences men into invulnerability, rigid, responsible figures who should be only bothered with the provision of a family and nothing more. On the other side of the same spectrum, females are supposed to be caretakers of the whole family and child bearers and nothing more.
Blaming a whole movement takes a lot of oversimplication. Yes, and one that is in its fourth wave takes courage. Pitting two different genders against each other does not lead to any statement, let alone a solution. The human mind likes to stop and simplify overwhelming change in the most basic manner, even if that is not the case. And when it comes in the form of women who are not willing to settle for just a provider and their money, who gets to assert dominance over their lives, it becomes a change that society has not faced before. Hence, the gravitation towards a famous cause- Feminism.
Real Solutions for this "Epidemic"
Podcasts and videos about how women have been crushing the souls of men are definitely not the answer. Addressing a problem as massive as loneliness lies in rebuilding community, expanding emotional literacy and definitely, in creating supportive spaces. This can include peer groups with mentorship programs, initiatives, workplace cultures, or simply accepting oneself as one's best friend. It takes more than a little amount of effort and time to gain results, but in the long run, it is necessary for survival. Not only for society, but for oneself too.
Framing solutions by rolling back women's gains undermines history, sustainability and more essentially supports the yore-old idea that the societal structure should be male-centric. The very fact that the male loneliness epidemic is something that has made the headlines while women trafficking, child marriage and rape cases are still at large upholds the bitter truth about this society. The truth is that society still thinks about men as the superior gender.
What we need is not necessarily an anti-feminist solution, but an effective gender neutral one which includes emotional expression, interdependence of the two genders and rebuilding trust for one another. Human beings are social creatures, and at the end of the day, nothing can be built without a society to address things for.
Conclusion
Male loneliness is a crisis indeed but it is not the result of Feminism trying to make men obsolete. It is the outcome of a change in the societal structure where the other genders are not willing to settle for the bare minimum. This might leave men underprepared for what comes next, but the solution for this is straightforward. The conversation has to shift from blame to understanding, and finally accepting. Loud voices in the form of podcasts, pointing fingers at women, will only offer catharsis and display outrage at the wrong issues. Realizing the complexity of genders, learning the changes in society occurring over time will give a deeper insight into such matters and might finally help. If not, then taking up a hobby has always been known to help fight loneliness, so maybe this could be a happy solution.
